A job that I love.

For years, I felt fulfilled and believed that was because I was one of the lucky few who have a job that they love. My career and profession gave me a lot of pleasure. When I lost that gratification and the feeling of being accomplished, I assumed it was because I've fallen out of love with my job.

I have recently realized that I was wrong.  My lack of fulfillment actually has nothing to do with my career at all. It has to do with my true calling. I miss my true vocation. I miss being a mother.

I miss caring for my kids and seeing them on daily basis. I miss cooking their favorite food (yes, in spite of the hate-hate relationship I have with the kitchen), and sitting with them around the dining table and discussing what they did at school, or at sports practice while eating dinner. I even miss eating the yucky leftovers in their plates. I miss buying their cloths, washing their laundry, making their beds, and watching TV with them,.

I miss driving them to swim, baseball, soccer, tennis, and basketball practice, and in the process, driving them crazy by playing nothing but Celine songs in the car. I miss listening to their usually out-of-tune piano practice, and going to their parents-teachers conferences and hearing good, and occasionally not so good things about them. I even miss feeling exhausted at the end of the day but going to bed feeling content and assured knowing that they are sleeping peacefully only a few feet away from me, ...........

Basically I miss them like crazy.

Since the probability of having a new baby at my age is slimmer than that of winning the lottery, or of Zamalek winning the league, or of Arabs enjoying true democracy and freedom in the near future, I hope that I will get a chance to enjoy the feeling of a full-time mother again, when I am blessed with grandchildren is shaa Allah. That is if my kids would allow me to help with raising their children.

Can't wait.